Friday With My Friend

Well I slept pretty good another night but I'm afraid it's because I've been taking the sleep aid pills. I don't want to get where I depend on them to help me sleep. I went to bed at 10:00 last night and went to sleep almost right away and I slept through the entire night again. I remember having strange dreams but when morning comes, I don't remember what the dreams were. I'm thinking the sleep aid may be causing the strange dreams even though it is just an OTC that I buy at Wal-Mart. It's their own brand. I was sitting on the sofa this morning thinking about the lonely weekend approaching and I remember how one of my “widow friends” that I met online made the comment about how she hates the entire concept of widowhood. She said “the whole thing totally sucks”. How often do I repeat those words? There really is no other way to describe it. When you shared your life with that very special person and suddenly they are removed from your life, the emptiness is so overwhelming. I kept wondering if Ben and I had ever had children and they were in my life right now, would I still feel this way. But as I have discovered from my widow friends who do have children and grandchildren, they still feel that total emptiness. It's something no one can understand until they go through it personally. I was so glad that Linda emailed me and said she was going over to Sam's Club and Wal-Mart this morning and said I could ride over with her if I wanted something to do. These days I'll jump at anything anyone offers so I don't have to stay home alone all day. She picked me up a little after 10:00 am. She was trying to upgrade her phone at Sam's but has to wait for something on her contract to get fixed before they can upgrade her, so then we went over to Wal-Mart for her to exchange a blouse she had bought. After that, she asked if we could go to lunch somewhere, so we ended up going to Dinks New York Deli which is the place DeDee took me last week. After lunch, we walked around The Patios and ended up going into the new Apple Store to ask a few questions about the iPads. She dropped me back by home around 1:30 pm. Linda's son and his family are coming up to visit her this weekend, so she booked a couple of rooms over at La Quinta Inn and she is heading over there later this afternoon to be with them. I paid some bills and then gave myself a haircut with my Flowbee. I always feel sad when I do that now because I used to always give Ben a trim with it before I would cut my hair.