Saturday, January 16, 2010

Contemplating 60

Tomorrow (Jan. 17) I turn 60.
What does this mean?
It’s “just a number”, right?
But when I was 18, it would have meant that I’m OLD!
Now, it doesn’t really seem all that “old” except when I think that “if I’m lucky”, I only have about 25 to 30 more years of life. Maybe 40 years IF I’m “really” lucky. Hell, I worked at Lockheed almost THAT long. Over half my life ”wasted“ working at Lockheed. Oh well, it did give us the means to have a comfortable life, so I guess I don’t regret that. AND I met a lot of nice people who are still very good friends of mine, so I guess those years were not really wasted. Where did all those years go?
My hair is totally gray. I always had dark brown hair when I was young and I always wanted to know what it would be like to have a lighter color of hair. Well, now I know. It gets me discounts at fast food places, the zoo, and several other events. So I actually like it!
My mind still thinks “young”, but my body won’t let me do what I tell it to anymore. What’s with that?
I’ve seen a lot of history in my almost 60 years.
A president assassinated. Man walking on the moon. Television going from “black and white” to “color”. A war that America could not win (and maybe a second one). A president resign from office. Medical miracles like organ transplants and even artificial organs. The invention of the home computer. Being able to communicate with people all around the world in seconds instead of hours or days. Telephones that fit in your pocket and no longer have to be connected by a cord to the wall. Our homeland attacked. A woman running for president. And a black man actually becoming president! Now that’s something that NEVER would have happened in the 1950’s. But hopefully today, a person’s color doesn’t “offend” people like it did back then.
My grandmother (my mom’s mom) never even got to see 60. She died at age 57. I never got to meet her. She died exactly one month before I was born. She’s been gone for 60 years now.
When I grew up, moms didn’t work. They stayed home and took care of the kids and the house. THAT was their job. I don’t think I knew one kid back then whose parents were divorced.
Children respected and obeyed their parents, their teachers, the police and any other adult. I miss that.
I’m not really afraid of dying. I’m afraid of having cancer, or a heart attack, or a stroke, or Alzheimer’s. I’m afraid that it might hurt before I die, but I’m not afraid to die.
What I’m really afraid of is being alone. Ben and I never had children. That was our choice. I’m selfish in hoping that I die first so I won’t lose Ben and be alone. But, neither of us knows who will die first. That’s not up to us.
I try to be with my brothers as much as possible because none of us ever knows how long we’ll be here. Ron is 67 now and Keith is 54. My dad died at age 67. He was still very young when he died.
So what is 60?
60 is 10 more than 50.
60 is the natural number following 59 and preceding 61.
60 means that 60% of my life has passed, assuming I live to be 100.
Hell, I’ve survived this long and I’m still going strong (well sort of :D). I may as well broadcast it to the world.

I’M 60!

So here’s to ME and to however many more years God has for me on this earth.
Now my main question is….
How can I be turning sixty tomorrow when it seems like I was just 18 yesterday? Go figure.

1 comment:

  1. Happy Birthday!! I hope you have a great one, doing whatever you want to do. My hubby will be 60 in June, I will be 47 in April. We have 2 daughters 19 and one who will be 17 in April. I have a stepson who will be 40 in February...that's when it gets a little weird...ha. But it's true, we still feel the same as we always did inside, but the pains we sometimes get make us do some things differently...ha. Have a great day, Sheila


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