Another Lazy Day

I am really not liking me for letting myself become so lazy in the past few months. I don't know if it is the heat or what, but I just cannot make myself get up in the morning. When I was working, I used to get up at 4:30 am because I had a 40 mile commute to work. After I retired, Ben and I still go up fairly early because Ben was still working three day a week. We would never stay in bed past 7 am. When Ben passed away, my sleeping habits started changing so much. At first I could not sleep and then I would sleep too much. My sleeping habits finally settled down and I was doing really good. I'd go to bed at 9 pm, watch TV in bed until 10 pm and then go to sleep. I would get up sometime between 6 and 7 am and take Hiker out for walks. I still get up at 6 am on the days I have dog walks planned with Jean, but it's getting harder and harder. Maybe when Fall gets here and the weather gets a little cooler, I'll get back to my old ways. It was already 90° around 11 am when the gardener and his son showed up to mow my lawn. I feel sorry for them in this heat. I don't know why...maybe it's the heat, but my milk has been going bad several days before it's “sell by” date. I had to throw out almost a half gallon of milk this morning because it had soured. I was having more strange dreams this morning before I woke up. One of them had Ben in it again. This time he actual spoke in the dream, but I don't know if in the dream he was supposed to be dead or not. In my other dreams of him, I know he's dead but he is with me in the dream. Anyway, in this dream, I noticed that he had tattoos on his arms. Ben hated tattoos and I asked him why he had them. He got angry with me and just said “leave me alone”. Then I was in a different dream. I was at some kind of party (like Tupperware or something like that). I remember seeing two or three Lockheed friends there. I had parked my car in a parking lot in a shopping center. I hadn't seen the “10 minute parking only” signs and when I came out, my car had been towed away. I was trying to find out where it had been towed too and I didn't know what to do, then I woke up.