Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Hearing Thunder On Tuesday Afternoon
"There is no despair so absolute as that which comes with the first moments of our first great sorrow, when we have not yet known what it is to have suffered and be healed, to have despaired and recovered hope." George Eliot
Was awake until around 1:00 am this morning. It figures....I had been going to sleep around 9:30 or 10:00 PM for the past few nights and now I'm back to the staying awake again. As I said before, I'll have a couple of good nights and then I'm back to the insomnia. Today was my grief support group. I thought today's session was one of our best. A lot of good discussion. I really felt like today's group was helpful to me. Even though I naturally have my “bad” days, I am so glad that I decided to start going to a grief support group right after Ben died because I really feel that being with other people who are going through the same loss as I am is helpful to me. DeDee and I went to lunch after the group and I told her that last night I had a “revelation”. I was watching “Rizzoli & Isles” and I guess I was pretty wrapped up in the storyline. The show broke for a commercial and suddenly I realized that I had not been thinking about Ben for the past 15 or 20 minutes. That's the first time I had had a feeling like that in the past 3 months. I'm thinking that this is a “good thing”. Linda had planned on going to lunch with us but she was not done with her volunteer work at the senior center. I'll be having lunch with her tomorrow. Temperatures got into the mid 90's today and sunny with some really big thunderheads. Around 3:00 pm I started hearing thunder and got some huge rain drops but not a lot.